Breetelgeuse

Sites and apps like Tumblr, Instagram, and even Facebook have me dreaming in a world I don’t really live in. I dream so big. I like to pretend a lot. I like to create. Movies do this to me, too. They get me thinking in a different, unique way and I get to exercise a new part of my imagination. I just really, really enjoy the escape these things bring from the actual world. Honestly, the internet was SUCH a brilliant idea. Bravo, humans. I just have trouble cutting the cord when I leave to go out and actually live out there. I don’t know how to not dream. I don’t know how to not apply these ideas I get when I am on the computer. I love it. I can be anonymous if I want to be. I can do anything. Ha, ha, ha. As soon as I get too “fictional” in the real world for other people’s taste, I know I’ve gone too far. I have allowed my internet imagination to run wild and to seep into my actual life. Learning how to harness this desire to live the way I think is a whole notha story. I understand why people live for chat rooms and stuff. It’s crazy, but I understand it.

It almost makes me sick to see couples on Facebook having a jolly good time telling each other they are crazy in love in front of everybody. lyk omgz my luv 4 u iz nvrending bby <3 But, y’know, I guess everyone’s different. I’ve learned from personal experience and from others that those who are more focused on actually developing a super personal relationship with somebody rather than for the publicity it brings tend to keep the relationship alive for much longer. Lolz. My older sister has been with her boyfriend for almost 5 years and they are engaged, but neither of them have never felt the need to post about it everywhere. That’s just the thing- Privacy has changed since the internet has been around. I’m even sharing my deep feelings about other people’s deep feelings. Wtheck, Shrek?

It’s also very easy to be a Christian when you’re alone. It’s easy to welcome God’s presence in the quiet times of your day. What is difficult is being a Christian in public- breaking free of the fear and the silly embarrassment that comes with openly sharing your faith. It’s difficult being a Christian right in the midst of a busy day when you are surrounded by many different types of people. It’s really, really hard. Why?! Why is it that when we have accepted Jesus Christ as our Savior we stay silent about it?! Why do we only share it once in a while when we are in a comfortable place? Why do we convince ourselves it’s okay to back off and avoid dangerous situations that challenge us and our beliefs? How can we expect God to help us grow when we can’t even speak of His name, let alone attest to the amazing things He’s doing in our lives once in a while?

Yes, I have been silent in public when there has been a revolutionary change going on in my heart. I have also met people that want to say I’m “doing too much” when something epic happens inside me and I can’t help but shout it out everywhere I go. Sure, it might look like I’m doing too much. Maybe nobody else is doing enough… At every stage of your life, if you are a Christian, stop being ashamed of what you hear at church. Stop being ashamed of how you have chosen to live. You made a verbal choice, now live by it.

We sit and listen to everyone else in the world talk about their sex, drugs, alcohol, and selfish behavior yet we shut right up when it’s our turn. People will listen to a whole bunch of crap before even questioning if it’s wrong. Most go on living like none of what they do is a big deal. Well, here I am. I am a Christian that will no longer sit in the background in grimy conversations. Everyone can have their turn to speak, but when it’s my turn, I will be asking the questions. There’s no question about it- If there is room for useless chatter about all of the illegal and sickly things we as humans do, there must be a place somewhere for questioning whether or not it’s wrong. Where there is right, there is wrong. Where there is night, there is day. Where there is light, there is dark. The end. I am completely convicted and encouraged today.